What Comes After the Stages of Grief and How to Move Forward After Loss
What Comes After the Stages of Grief and How to Move Forward After Loss
I was thinking about covid and how people cannot grieve in a “normal” way right now. Many cannot attend funerals and gather with family and it got me thinking that hundreds of thousands of people have lost a loved one in the last several months. I wanted to bring Katie Clarizio on the podcast to talk about the loss of a loved one.
Katie Clarizio is a professional educator and holistic health and wellness coach in training. She helps people adapt to their new lives after a life-altering loss by finding harmony in nourishment of their mind and body.
In this podcast episode we talk about how after the initial morning process occurs, people try to move forward with their grief. She works to teach clients to weave grief into their new life in an optimistic way, showing people that they can reduce judgments by changing their mindset.
She teaches that it is okay to feel good and to have a life you love! To listen to the whole podcast episode click HERE.
One thing that really stuck out to me is how the stages of grief were adapted to what we think of today. Katie talks about how the stages are not exactly stages in a step wise progression. Our own expectations and judgements get in the way of healing because it looks so simple on paper.
In reality, if we can stop judging ourselves that we aren’t farther along in the stages or we haven’t moved on yet then we would all be better off.
They also found a new stage and that is Finding Meaning. In this finding meaning stage, people can move forward with grief and work towards new routines and habits.
Katie suggests incorporating health and wellness habits into our grief journey as a way to help create normal and healthy habits after loss.
She talks about how focusing on gratitude is important, exercise, meditation, prayer and routines can all be helpful in moving forward with loss.
One thing that really stuck out to me is that during a daily gratitude practice it’s easy to focus on the senses. For example: This cup of coffee smells delicious, feels good in my hands, and tastes great.
She also talks about what to do when someone close to you loses a loved one. Going with that person for the business type things that need to be done is very helpful. Things like planning the funeral, closing out bank accounts, moving around assets and liabilities is very difficult, tedious, and downright emotional. If someone can go with you and say what need to be done so that the person who is grieving can just sign the paperwork then it’s a lot easier.
Also instead of saying things like “Let me know if you need anything”.
We can change that too things like: “Can I bring you a lasagna on Tuesday afternoon”, “Can I come over and help you with laundry or cutting your grass this weekend”, etc.
My biggest takeaway was that if we can take the expectations, timelines and judgements away from our healing journey then we will be able to move forward with grief in a healthier more whole way.
If you are looking for a starting place with your daily gratitude practice or incorporating healthy habits just click HERE.